If you never speak up you’ll never know how easier if would have been and how a better road that would have been if only you had opened up and break the silence. How acting a smile when all is not okay worsens the situation by the day.
When sudden changes happen in our lives everyone deals with it differently but knowing myself that caught me by surprise most especially when I had all the certainty that someone had my back only to realize I was alone , that I actually had been alone all the time.
And just to think that I didn’t see it all along. And everything that brought me cheer and happiness suddenly was bile and annoying to me. For a moment was so angry at myself and it kept playing over and over in my head. But then again I realized I can’t be so hard on myself that would be unfair on me.
My sleep pattern changed at first I was sleeping longer then the timing started to reduce and insomnia happened. So I switched to watching movies and music But concentration span was totally zero.
Whatever was going on in my head can’t be easily described but I remember moments of being chocked by anger, sadness, fear, anxiety and stress so I guess I was depressed Yes no maybe. All I knew was I just had to fight out and fight on….
Risk it all, talk open up to someone you trust or to that person who has extended there wholesome self as trustworthy to you. Your people will never see you sink and just watch I have full trust in that..
It’s very easy to hide and put on a smile and live on without anyone noticing that you’re struggling to keep that face that smile to keep everything okay and in check. And it just hit me so hard how so many people out here are hold up in the world of depression and anxiety most especially our male counterpart find it so hard to open up about it.
How am I currently? Fighting on that’s what am doing and keeping it one day at a time forgiving and letting go working on the so much that I had lacked the energy and synergy to attend to and as as Dwayne The Rock Johnson says “..when times get tough, hold onto faith and always be willing to put in the very hard work with my own two hands..”
Keep it here ♥ , so much to do and it will be done, delivered and exceeding my own expectations fall 99 times rise 100.
It will get better in time.
Much love to all my support system friends and those who have always stuck up for me you guys are my heroes and biggest motivation.
Where Feet May Fail – Hillsong United.
Photography : Prologue Creative _ Tapawa and Bonnie Wekesa
Miss Flônt It
“My strength come from lifting myself up after I have been knocked down .”